Five ways the Pandemic has changed Relationships

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Written by Natalia Lomaia

Natalia Lomaia is a creative writer, freelance writer, and psychology student living in Berlin, Germany. Although she was passionate about reading and writing since childhood, Natalia started pitching her work to different magazines three years ago. She got published in New York Times and World Literature Today. Natalia also founded zine in which, as an editor, she tries to highlight the importance of psychoanalysis. You can follow her on twitter natalialomaia_

March 2, 2022

Natalia Lomaia explores the five most significant and fundamental ways in which the COVID 19 pandemic has transformed marriages, friendships, and all kinds of relationships. 

Back in 2020, no one could have imagined the whole world changing almost overnight. Suddenly, living in fear, experiencing grief, expecting lockdowns, wearing masks, and working from home became mundane and ordinary experiences—the new normal. 

When the world as you know it crumbles down and you need to adjust to the not-so-pleasant reality, relationships mainly either flourish or crush under the weight of the chaos. Because of the extended lockdowns, some people had to spend much more time with their parents than planned but surprisingly became closer with them; others experienced the opposite. Some couples feared working from home and spending weeks or even months together. Some, on the contrary, were excited about such an opportunity. 

At the same time, many people had to be completely alone during the lockdowns, which was especially hard on outgoing and sociable persons. Some were maybe even challenged to build a better, more solid relationship with themselves. Some, on the contrary—experienced symptoms of depression and anxiety

Overall, there is no doubt that the pandemic caused all sorts of changes in the context of relationships. However, In this article, we will focus on the five most significant and fundamental changes:

1. Mental Health 

Regardless of how close your connection with a spouse or family member is, some people get increasingly anxious and irritated during times of stress and chaos, which impairs their ability to be patient and non confrontational with other people. As a result, conflicts arise, so people often drift apart in similar scenarios. 

Some individuals react to stress by shutting down emotionally and experiencing the symptoms of depression. Consequently, people often isolate themselves and lose a close connection even with the most loving and caring partner, friend, sibling, or parent. 

Photo Credit: Frosina Polazarevska (Unsplash)

2. Sex Life 

The coronavirus pandemic has negatively affected the sex lives of both single and married people. Even now, two years since the Pandemic started, meeting people via dating websites causes fear and feels dangerous because, among other concerns, it means risking getting infected with COVID-19. Lengthy lockdowns and being constantly bombarded by alarming news created an unpleasant, unsafe environment for most people globally. As a result, numerous individuals faced massive levels of anxiety, fear, and concern about financial stability and health. Amid the Pandemic, many people felt insecure and unsure about the future. When you feel like your basic survival is in question, most likely, sex would not even cross your mind. 

Rhonda Nicole Balzarini, researcher and author of the scientific paper titled “how COVID-related stressors are associated with sexual desire in romantic relationships,” mentions that the study’s main conclusion is a clear connection between stress, depression, and sexual desire. She argues that stressors may not have been triggering depression during the onset of the Pandemic. However, when such stressors became chronic, people grew exhausted. She explains that stress is associated with depression, and “depression has a detrimental effect on sexual desire.” 

3. Boredom 

Any relationship, including partnership or friendship, needs change and novelty. Friendships rarely last without regular follow-ups and partners rarely grow closer without balancing alone time, date nights, work, and rich social life. Conversely, stagnation, lack of novelty, and boredom can seriously weaken even the strongest and closest relationships. However, maintaining a healthy balance is rarely possible when a tiny apartment turns into space for not only date nights and work, but in some cases, also into a school or kindergarten for children.

4. Reconnecting 

While the general effect of the pandemic undoubtedly remains harmful, still, in the context of relationships, because of the lockdowns and loneliness, some people were able to reconnect with estranged parents, siblings, or friends, and in some cases even heal and appreciate the relationships which seemed hopeless or lost. 

5. Building a better relationship with yourself 

The role of busyness in the modern world peaked long before the pandemic, so the lockdowns provided a chance for millions of people to slow down and reflect. Although loneliness and boredom can get daunting, many people were challenged not only to engage in meaningful self-care routines, practice meditation, and eat healthily but also to find peace and comfort within themselves. 

  • Tips and Recommendations

Stay Connected 

At the end of the day, especially during the challenging and chaotic times, relationships and connections are crucial for our mental wellbeing and even survival, so putting effort into nurturing them is essential. 

First of all, it is vital to be present and find as much time as possible to interact with friends and family. Being present means paying close attention to the people in your life despite the stress and avoiding distractions like your phone. Even if it’s just ten minutes of communication, make sure to really listen to what others are saying but at the same time try to avoid emotional burnout: share your own thoughts and concerns with others too. It is crucial to allow others to support you while supporting them. 

Schedule Self-Care 

When both work and leisure happen in the same space, structuring a day in a way that would benefit our mental health 

becomes problematic. At the same time, having a routine is a barebone of having a stable mood and wellness in general. 

To avoid conflicts with loved ones and ensure you are taking care of yourself, don’t rely on remembering to practice self-care during the day, but schedule it. First of all, make sure to get enough sleep. At the same time, try to wake up a little earlier than everyone else and have a cup of tea or coffee in peace, maybe even meditate and write a plan for the day. 

Schedule time for physical exercise and make it a priority. Choose a type of exercise that you especially enjoy. Being connected to your body and moving as much as possible should be a part of any self-care plan. 

Taking care of your mental health and body is essential to avoiding conflicts and having patience with other people. By ensuring your mood is stable most of the time and your levels of stress are not peaking, you lower the chance of conflicts and miscommunication with your loved ones.

Featured Image Credit: Afif Kusuma (Unsplash)

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